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“My whole life I’ve dreamed of taking my kids camping. I even saved kid-size camping chairs from my childhood to set up around the campfire. I grew up fishing and hiking with my dad, and even loved winter camping trips with my fellow Boy Scouts.......
“I just can’t believe it, everything is different now,” Madeline sobbed, shoulders shaking as she reached for the tissue box. “What do you mean?” I softly asked. “We were fine. Mom and Daddy weren’t together, but we had our 2 houses and everything. Now it’s......
“I just found out my favorite aunt has terminal cancer,” Bobby shared. “She’s one of the most wonderful people in the world! She never missed a birthday, always came to my soccer games, and made me feel exceptionally special. I just can’t believe she’s dying.”......
(Trauma trigger warning; this could be a difficult story to read, depending on your personal history.) Pain. Part of my daily life is sitting with people in the midst of deep, dark, raw pain. “Is it normal for someone to try and have sex with......
“I am done with on-line dating!” Suzanne emphatically declared. “Oh no, what happened?” I asked. A few months ago Suzanne had passionately researched on-line dating options for people over 60, and landed on a few sites that focused on her age-range, retirement status, and her......
Bruce lives an enviable life. Having worked for years in the corporate world, his retirement includes the financial resources to afford luxurious vacations, high-end sports equipment, and a new modern home with expansive views. He enjoys an active dating life, attends various charitable functions, and......
Bob started talking even before he sat down in the chair. “I’ve made so many changes in my life! Over the past few years I’ve stopped using substances, started exercising, included vegetables and fruit in my diet, reconnected with my adult kids, and just wrapped......
Trevor looked at me with tears spilling onto his cheeks, “I just want to see my cousins for the solstice. We always go to their house. I don’t understand why I don’t get to go this year.” Trevor and I were in the middle of......
Tina sat in front of me with a huge grin on her face. “I did it!” she exclaimed. “I convinced him to take the kids while I go to Mexico with my girlfriends.” I felt confused. Tina had been talking with me for months about......
Paul came to the Zoom screen looking exhausted, yawning after every answer to my checking-in questions. “What’s going on?” I finally asked him. “Are you sleeping ok?” “I guess,” he mumbled. I started asking him about his schedule for the past week. “Normal?” he said.......
Yvonne came to her counseling session upset about her friend group. “I’m always the one that initiates getting together,” she explained. “I find the movie, pick the latest restaurant, or find the concert tickets. Then I text everyone, coordinate schedules, budgets and rides, and finally......
Donovan had minimal contact with his father, Joseph. As a young man he’d had some serious fights with his dad, over everything from money to his character. Now in his 60’s, Donovan came to me to work on a plan to re-connect with his dad,......
It’s not the wildflowers or the long sunny days that let me know summer is in full swing, it’s that Susie has stopped coming to counseling. Many of her complaints—dissatisfaction with her house, her family, her job, her friendships—can be “fixed” by the change in...
Susie sits sobbing talking once more about her husband. “He’s a good father and a sweet man. He’s never cheated on me; all my friends tell me I’m really lucky to be married to such an amazing man.” I sit quietly, waiting for the kernel...
The weather’s finally warm enough for your friends and relatives to come up the hill for a picnic. The afternoon seems to go fairly well. Your niece in now a vegan, but her grandmother saves the day by bringing tofu hotdogs. Everyone’s talking about your...
A man sits in front of me exploring if he wants to leave his wife. Before he came to me he weighed the pros and cons, had an affair, re-committed to his wife, talked with friends and searched for advice on the internet. But now...
Last week I was having lunch with a fellow counselor who practices in Boulder. We were discussing rates and she asked me what I charged per session. Knowing my fee was less than hers I hemmed and hawed before finally telling her. Her loud reaction...
Can you think of someone that always seems to have good luck, always coming out on top? It’s possible that they’re good at acting and have everyone fooled, or they’re in a state of denial. But for now, let’s say it’s really true; they quickly...
I sat in a state of shock, hoping my face appeared somewhat neutral. A ten year old girl was sharing with me what happened to her father. “He was mad all the time,” she whispered. “He was mad, then sad, then…,” her voice trailed off....
I stood staring at the Victorian apartment house in front of me. I could feel eyes peeking at me from behind the smudged curtains and broken blinds. I knew if I didn’t get moving quickly someone would come out and ask me if I was...
Here I was, 20 years old, volunteering in Ciudad Juárez, Mexico at an orphanage and medical clinic. It was two in the morning and I was waiting for bread to rise with a group of Mexican women. We had just gotten a large donation of...
What caught my attention was her fluffy fur hat in the midst of worn-out bathrobes, falling-down socks and shapeless winter coats. I was sitting with a group of ladies at an assisted-living facility, trying to survive the freezing cold temperatures on the smoking porch. Every...
“I am done with on-line dating!” Suzanne emphatically declared. “Oh no, what happened?” I asked. A few months ago Suzanne had passionately researched on-line dating options for people over 60, and landed on a few sites that focused on her age-range, retirement status, and her religious beliefs.
Bruce lives an enviable life. Having worked for years in the corporate world, his retirement includes the financial resources to afford luxurious vacations, high-end sports equipment, and a new modern home with expansive views. He enjoys an active dating life, attends various charitable functions, and connects regularly with his kids. As he was sharing all his accomplishments and resources with me, I began to wonder why he came in for counseling.
Bob started talking even before he sat down in the chair. “I’ve made so many changes in my life! Over the past few years I’ve stopped using substances, started exercising, included vegetables and fruit in my diet, reconnected with my adult kids, and just wrapped up my last debt payment. It’s like I’m a new person, and everyone is always complimenting me. But I still have times when I have the old thoughts and fight to not do old behaviors, like being mean and selfish to my family. I don’t want to be the old me anymore, but sometimes I feel like I can’t help it.”
Trevor looked at me with tears spilling onto his cheeks, “I just want to see my cousins for the solstice. We always go to their house. I don’t understand why I don’t get to go this year.” Trevor and I were in the middle of a play therapy session, surrounded by toys of food, dogs, cats, people, playground equipment, a grill, books, and his favorite stuffed animal. Trevor was creating a happy family celebration scene, and then showing me that unseen storm or force would come in and destroy the joyful scene.
