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“That’s it, I’m ready. It’s time for me to lose weight! I’m going to cut out sugar, simple carbs, meat, and dairy.” “I’m sick and tired of my kid being such a problem. I’m going on a vacation and he’s going to have to wing...
“Our first grader, Jude, is the best. He’s fun and funny, sweet and kind…” Sarah’s words trailed off. “He sounds like a great kiddo,” I said. “The thing is, he’s had challenges since birth. He struggled to eat, his sleep schedule is still off, and...
“I’m so angry at my sister. I have been taking care of my elderly mother for over ten years now. I pick up her medications, drive her to the doctor, sit with her through choir practice and take her shopping every week. My sister has...
“Once I make enough money, we’ll sell everything and move to an island. We can live off the land!” Sam to his 10 year old son, Tom “Once I have that first bite of chocolate cake, the world disappears and I feel free.” Joe in...
Penny, a woman in her early twenties, sits across from me with an intense expression on her face. “I’ve come to a realization,” she declares. “What’s that?” I ask. “I’ve decided I’m going to be single the rest of my life.” In the past year...
My week starts with three new clients interested in counseling. Sandra wants to lose weight. She’s been 100 pounds overweight for most of her adult life with high blood pressure, asthma, high cholesterol, and pre-diabetic symptoms. From a family that struggles with weight, she’d been...
With the election of Donald Trump the psychological term “gaslighting” is experiencing a resurgence in popularity and brings people into my office asking, “Am I being gaslighted?” As with other charged words, I think it’s helpful to take some time and understand the terms origins...
We live in a unique part of the state. Although technically Gilpin, Jefferson, Clear Creek and Boulder counties are considered urban, often we face health issues traditionally viewed as rural. (http://www.commonwealthfund.org/publications/newsletters/transforming-care/2017/march/in-focus?omnicid=1187163&mid=vernamd@ubhc.rutgers.edu) Rural America faces higher levels of smoking, diabetes, coronary heart disease and suicides. Additionally...
I sat with Margaret and Larry through years of fertility challenges. Initially it was a curiosity as to why they weren’t getting pregnant like their friends, then enduring invasive medical tests and procedures. Next we dove into discussions about adoption while Margaret took time with...
Mary and Tom, married for 40 years, come into my office with one question: “Should we stay married or get divorced?” Tom grew up on a Midwestern farm, rising early to milk the cows and feed the chickens. He was the oldest of five, and...
“I’m so angry with my family,” Walt said. “I never get any breaks. Life is always about working on the house, or working at my job to pay the bills, or helping out our neighbors. Seriously, I never get any FUN time.” Walt’s wife, Cynthia,......
“I am endlessly tired, Amy,” Vivian said. “I know my son needs extra attention with his recent diagnosis. I know my daughter is struggling with me not being around enough. I know my parents need extra time as they’re aging. But seriously, how much more......
“I’ve always been a runner,” Jane explained as she struggled to settle into the chair and prop her foot up on the footstool. “It’s who I am. I found running in my 20’s and started doing local 5K’s. Then I moved up here and discovered......
“I just don’t get my family. I’ve worked hard my whole life to give them what they need, and want! At the start of my career I’d work 60 hours a week or more, two jobs most of the time. I missed piano concerts and......
“So there I am, pouring my heart out to my mom. My oldest son had recently been in a car accident, and broke his leg. Our main family car needed $2000 of repairs and our credit cards are maxed out. My youngest daughter’s cat ran......
Missy and Suzanne had been best friends since their husbands met over 30 years ago. Marriages, children, sick parents, moves, renovations, churches—they’d been through it all together. “But now,” said Missy, “now I don’t know what to do.” Suzanne came to Missy and shared that......
“My father survived terrible childhood trauma,” Tabby shared. “Although he never talks to me about it, my cousin shared that my grandfather was physically abusive. And I’ve heard my grandpa be verbally abusive. Plus addiction runs in my family. I have an uncle who’s sober,......
“We’re here to work on our communication,” Sue said as she and her husband sat down. “I don’t think we know how to fight.” “Know how to fight?” said her husband Eric. “I’m sick of fighting! I want to be able to communicate better so......
“My goal for 2025 is to open my own art studio! I’ve been selling my creations on Etsy and at festivals, but I think it’s finally time for a brick and mortar shop.” Teddy, who came in for business coaching, bounced in his seat with......
“I can’t believe what my niece cooks for the holidays; it’s ridiculous,” exclaimed Ashley. “She already has a weight problem, as does the rest of her family! What am I saying? Of course they do. The house is full of cookies, candy, cakes, pies, and......
“It’s our family holiday tradition,” Betty exasperatedly explained. “We always go to the ski condo—grandparents, parents, spouses, kids, kids’ friends/partners, and great-grand kids. I can’t BELIEVE my sister isn’t coming this year. She is being so selfish! Our older family members don’t have many years......
“I’m scared we’re all gonna die,” Emma whispered. The five year old was creating an elaborate scene in the play room with 2 doll houses, numerous pieces of furniture, a variety of trees, people of all shapes and sizes, cars (“a fast one like my......
“I am done with on-line dating!” Suzanne emphatically declared. “Oh no, what happened?” I asked. A few months ago Suzanne had passionately researched on-line dating options for people over 60, and landed on a few sites that focused on her age-range, retirement status, and her religious beliefs.
Bruce lives an enviable life. Having worked for years in the corporate world, his retirement includes the financial resources to afford luxurious vacations, high-end sports equipment, and a new modern home with expansive views. He enjoys an active dating life, attends various charitable functions, and connects regularly with his kids. As he was sharing all his accomplishments and resources with me, I began to wonder why he came in for counseling.
Bob started talking even before he sat down in the chair. “I’ve made so many changes in my life! Over the past few years I’ve stopped using substances, started exercising, included vegetables and fruit in my diet, reconnected with my adult kids, and just wrapped up my last debt payment. It’s like I’m a new person, and everyone is always complimenting me. But I still have times when I have the old thoughts and fight to not do old behaviors, like being mean and selfish to my family. I don’t want to be the old me anymore, but sometimes I feel like I can’t help it.”
Trevor looked at me with tears spilling onto his cheeks, “I just want to see my cousins for the solstice. We always go to their house. I don’t understand why I don’t get to go this year.” Trevor and I were in the middle of a play therapy session, surrounded by toys of food, dogs, cats, people, playground equipment, a grill, books, and his favorite stuffed animal. Trevor was creating a happy family celebration scene, and then showing me that unseen storm or force would come in and destroy the joyful scene.
