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As a therapist there are moments you never forget and my time with Anthony was one of them. Anthony was a long-term on-again-off-again client who, at the moment, was trying to figure out how to start dating after a recent divorce. He was not appreciating...
“I haven’t spoken with my dad in 10 years,” said Anna, with a flat, mono-tone voice. “What happened?” I asked. “He was a fine dad. He worked two jobs, so he wasn’t around a lot. Teenage years we argued about the normal stuff—boys, drinking, grades....
“I’m a perfectionist. No matter what I’m doing I have to get it right every single time.” Todd just received a rejection from his #1 college choice. He was choking back tears as he explained he wasn’t sleeping well, eating regularly or spending time with...
Corey has the best Mom ever. “She makes yummy snacks for me and my friends, takes me down to the skate park, and makes sure I don’t see scary movies. She bugs me about my homework, but that’s ok. She’s supposed to.” “I can’t believe...
Daisy was known for her negativity. She’d receive a surprise check in the mail and complain that it wasn’t enough to help their “tiny income.” Her sister offered a guest room over the holidays and all Daisy could talk about was how cold, small and...
Jessy came in crying about her relationship with a close friend, Sam. “We’ve been there for each other through so many crises: her divorce, my brother’s stint in jail, everything. A few months ago Sam got mad at me for cancelling a few happy hours....
“That’s it, I’m ready. It’s time for me to lose weight! I’m going to cut out sugar, simple carbs, meat, and dairy.” “I’m sick and tired of my kid being such a problem. I’m going on a vacation and he’s going to have to wing...
“Our first grader, Jude, is the best. He’s fun and funny, sweet and kind…” Sarah’s words trailed off. “He sounds like a great kiddo,” I said. “The thing is, he’s had challenges since birth. He struggled to eat, his sleep schedule is still off, and...
“I’m so angry at my sister. I have been taking care of my elderly mother for over ten years now. I pick up her medications, drive her to the doctor, sit with her through choir practice and take her shopping every week. My sister has...
“Once I make enough money, we’ll sell everything and move to an island. We can live off the land!” Sam to his 10 year old son, Tom “Once I have that first bite of chocolate cake, the world disappears and I feel free.” Joe in...
“We’re here to work on our communication,” Sue said as she and her husband sat down. “I don’t think we know how to fight.” “Know how to fight?” said her husband Eric. “I’m sick of fighting! I want to be able to communicate better so......
“My goal for 2025 is to open my own art studio! I’ve been selling my creations on Etsy and at festivals, but I think it’s finally time for a brick and mortar shop.” Teddy, who came in for business coaching, bounced in his seat with......
“I can’t believe what my niece cooks for the holidays; it’s ridiculous,” exclaimed Ashley. “She already has a weight problem, as does the rest of her family! What am I saying? Of course they do. The house is full of cookies, candy, cakes, pies, and......
“It’s our family holiday tradition,” Betty exasperatedly explained. “We always go to the ski condo—grandparents, parents, spouses, kids, kids’ friends/partners, and great-grand kids. I can’t BELIEVE my sister isn’t coming this year. She is being so selfish! Our older family members don’t have many years......
“I’m scared we’re all gonna die,” Emma whispered. The five year old was creating an elaborate scene in the play room with 2 doll houses, numerous pieces of furniture, a variety of trees, people of all shapes and sizes, cars (“a fast one like my......
“I looked up the diagnosis on-line, and I think my mother’s a narcissist. She knows everything, endlessly talks about how important she used to be in her job (she’s retired), believe’s she’s SO special, and takes advantage of people around her.” Sue sat upright in......
“How often do you see your parents?” I asked Missy, a new Millennial client. “Oh, you know,” she answered evasively. I waited, but she didn’t continue. “What does that mean?” I wondered out loud. “I mean, they’re fine,” explained Missy. “My childhood was ok. No......
“I just want to make sure I’m doing everything right,” Rex explained. Rex had just moved to the area, and was coming in to talk about some life changes. “Doing it right?” I asked. “What do you mean?” “I kind of left my last......
“I do not know what to do with my employee,” Tristan breathed out an exacerbated sigh. “I’ve tried everything. It seems like he wanted more management time, so I set up an additional weekly meeting. Then he was having personal problems, so I brought in......
“My whole life I’ve dreamed of taking my kids camping. I even saved kid-size camping chairs from my childhood to set up around the campfire. I grew up fishing and hiking with my dad, and even loved winter camping trips with my fellow Boy Scouts.......
“I just can’t believe it, everything is different now,” Madeline sobbed, shoulders shaking as she reached for the tissue box. “What do you mean?” I softly asked. “We were fine. Mom and Daddy weren’t together, but we had our 2 houses and everything. Now it’s......
“I just found out my favorite aunt has terminal cancer,” Bobby shared. “She’s one of the most wonderful people in the world! She never missed a birthday, always came to my soccer games, and made me feel exceptionally special. I just can’t believe she’s dying.”......
“I am done with on-line dating!” Suzanne emphatically declared. “Oh no, what happened?” I asked. A few months ago Suzanne had passionately researched on-line dating options for people over 60, and landed on a few sites that focused on her age-range, retirement status, and her religious beliefs.
Bruce lives an enviable life. Having worked for years in the corporate world, his retirement includes the financial resources to afford luxurious vacations, high-end sports equipment, and a new modern home with expansive views. He enjoys an active dating life, attends various charitable functions, and connects regularly with his kids. As he was sharing all his accomplishments and resources with me, I began to wonder why he came in for counseling.
Bob started talking even before he sat down in the chair. “I’ve made so many changes in my life! Over the past few years I’ve stopped using substances, started exercising, included vegetables and fruit in my diet, reconnected with my adult kids, and just wrapped up my last debt payment. It’s like I’m a new person, and everyone is always complimenting me. But I still have times when I have the old thoughts and fight to not do old behaviors, like being mean and selfish to my family. I don’t want to be the old me anymore, but sometimes I feel like I can’t help it.”
Trevor looked at me with tears spilling onto his cheeks, “I just want to see my cousins for the solstice. We always go to their house. I don’t understand why I don’t get to go this year.” Trevor and I were in the middle of a play therapy session, surrounded by toys of food, dogs, cats, people, playground equipment, a grill, books, and his favorite stuffed animal. Trevor was creating a happy family celebration scene, and then showing me that unseen storm or force would come in and destroy the joyful scene.
